Saturday, April 11, 2009

Journal of a FAILED Dieter

Day before Day One
Bought ingredients for diet recipes. All excited for this diet plan. Had the timetable all drawn out and put up on the fridge just so I won't stray from the plan. Had a pre-celebration - consumed nasi lemak, white rice and ikan masak kicap, a packet of munchy's nuss hazelnut wafer (I think around 10-12 pieces), a 250ml carton of chocolate milk, 1 piece of pulut panggang, 2 pieces of kuih bakar and list went on till midnight. hehehe... some preparation, huh?

Day One
Had oat in the morning, apple for mid-am snack, orange salad for lunch. Frankly, it felt like first day puasa. Melepeksss.... it was Sunday so I was home most of the time. Did exercise for 10 minutes, couldn't do more as no. 5 would sit on me whenever he saw me lying down. Very supportive brat!

Day Two
Another round of oat today for breakfast. Funnily though that I somehow crave for food when on non-diet days I couldn't care less about food, take for instance the fish curry I cooked. Hmmm... I supposed this is what they call carbo craving. Had cheated a bit... had no heart to see the fish untouched so I kinda snack on that. Hah!! Anyway, exercise as usual - 10 minutes.

Day Three
Felt like dropping the whole plan altogether. Just couldn't take it. The recipes were simple, but it was a bit time consuming as I had to prepare them rather early, like soaking the beans and lentils the night before. Errmm although making the french or yogurt dressing only take up less than 5 minutes of my time. Here is when I started to make excuses for not eating right. What's more, the sambal sotong and chicken rice I cooked for the family were pure temptations. Sambal is my favourite, irresistable! So again I cheated... mix the rice with the leftover sambal and had that for lunch. mmmmmm.. really satisfying!

Day Four
It was raining heavily in the morning. As always, I associate rain with hunger. You know when the normal feeling you have when it's cold, the tummy seems to be talking. A lot. Still sticking to the diet plan though, bought nasi lemak for no. 1, 4 and 5. Ooohh the smell I tell you. Nearly tasted the sambal. Diet went smooth although couldn't really overcome the craving. Duh!

Day Five
And already I felt like the fiftieth day that I was deprived of sugar, carbo, protein etc etc aka FOOD. Honestly, no inspirational words neither the blue kebaya can change my mind at this point of time I can tell you. What's more there's sambal udang kertas and kembung asam pedas waiting down in the kitchen. Why in the world did I cook all the irresistable dishes while dieting - I totally have no idea.

Day Five - 5.30pm
I am officially a failed dieter. Started nibbling on the leftover apricots. Couldn't resist the cakes I baked for Maz... well this one I really had to - quality control purposes. Diet plan gone haywire.

Day Six and Seven
I was on oat and oatmeal on and off but slacking at every mealtime.

What I am trying to do is to have a balanced and healthy food since the waistline has stretched far more than I expected and it doesn't look like it's decreasing at all that I started hating it. I mean, if you don't start now, when will be the perfect time, right? But it only proved one thing - I just don't have the will power. I am weaky weaky WEAK. Very poor at disciplining myself. Not that I don't get support. In fact, I have Sha who constantly called to check what I had that particular day and reminded me of my goals. Sadly, that is not enough. A failure I am, up to this moment I haven't got the gut to stand on the scale yet although the one I stood on in the supermarket showed encouraging figure while the one at home showed totally different figure.

Anyhow, while I find it hard to be on this diet regime, I would stick to my oat and wholemeal bread somehow.... If you must know that ever since I started this diet, Sha has been filling me up with all sorts of other diet plans - the no-rice plan, the all-oat plan, the on n off plan.. in fact I came up with a plan too - book-way and Sha's-way plan. ;> Guess I'd stick to my new plan and hope that in time I will be able to follow the diet and reach my target.

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